(so it looks a little something like this!! I am serious a bit longer though)I decided today that I would dedicate Tuesdays to Random Rants.
So..... I work with this woman, “she who will not be named” but I lovingly refer to her as Keebler, seriously she looks like a Keebler elf, she should be on the front of the cookie package. She has the pointy ears, the little curly faced smile and she comes to approximately my armpits (not to difficult being that I am tall). So she who will not be named—Keebler has a chin hair, I am enamored and engulfed by this chin hair. It has kept me up at night!! I am positive she has caught me studying it on numerous occasions. I feel my arm automatically reaching towards it daily. It is far from inconspicuous it stands near the passenger side of her chin. I kid you not this MOTHA is close to two inches long, gray and it curl like a pigs tail (like 4 times spiral). It is blatantly obvious so as I said, I have been kept up at night by this hair on her chin with the following questions:
Does she see it?? Does she look in the mirror? (it is gray and all) Her lighting might be horrible!
Does she curl it like that EVERY morning?
Does she have anyone in her life that loves her?? (I expect those in my life to tell me when I have a 2 inch wiley hair sprouting from my face)
Is she growing it for locks of love?
Does she use it to floss her teeth?
Does she keep it for emergencies if she has to sew a hole in her pants?
Is there a greater purpose or meaning to chin hair then I have ever been told??(if this is the case I can stop incessantly plucking my hair)
Can’t she feel it when she cleans her face, rubs her chin, brushes her teeth?
How long does it take to grow a specimen of that nature?
Is her intention to place beads on this hair as I have seen before?
Don’t get me wrong I understand that a lot of people get inconspicuous hairs that pop out of strange places where they shouldn’t be growing. I get them a lot, “K” has this awesome one that pops up on her neck of all places, and this other cool one on her wrist, but because I love her I am sure to watch for it and intervene before it becomes obvious to the general public. But for the love of God people pluck them. Don’t make me stand there and obsess about them (I am not the only one that does this right?); I mean really this that I am speaking of is NOT a normal hair. I have tried to give you a visual hope you get it!!
So as I mentioned EVERYDAY I have thought about pulling it or telling her but I think now it has become my new obsession. It has become a slight distraction for me from this mumbo jumbo of tedious grant writing, so for now I will let Wiley Gray Hairs Lie.
disclaimer: I definitely wrote this blog in the heat of the moment today and it (after hours of sitting across from Keebler in her office) it was funny, much funnier while I wrote it and a bit of a release!! Thanks for the rant! You too can join me for "Random Rant Tuesdays" it could be fun!
7 comments:
that so funny. I agree. pluck that shit. When my wife gets them I tell her to pluck. Maybe she doesn't know that it's that obvious. Maybe she secretly knows it drives you crazy. I love the idea of ranting tuesdays. Although I feel sometimes like all my blog is is one great big rant.
OH, it's SOOOO easy to scoff at another man's folleys.
I TOO get the 1 random chin hair. One day it's not there....the next it damn near pokes my eye out.
I pluck mine. I also have 20/20 vision and would think that this munchkin you speak about must not.
Why else would she leave it.
Maybe, like food in your teeth :), you could say "hey Keeb, you've got a little something on your chin...here...let me get that for you !" You can pluck it, she will be grateful and all will be right in the world.
Too damn funny!!!
I've so got a visual image of Keebler with the big long hair.
you know, I also get the random chin hair that one day is not there and the next day Kristin's brushing my chin and doing exactly what K suggested - the mercy pluck. I don't know how it grows so fast without my noticing especially as it's dark like my head hairs...
That is funny dude! I don't know why people don't groom themselves properly. I hate it when I see those long hairs, big pimples that need to be popped, or hair growing places it shouldn't!
That was a great keebler elf story, even had Fred laughing. You got to love those little buggers. Wait until you are in flash hell and you will sprout like morning glory everywhere. Just remember when you have my last viewing clean up the upper lip, chin, annnnd toes. Good people must have a lot in common with the neck hairs. Got one also K. thanks for the laugh
How long do I have to look at the nasty ass facial hair !!! GET IT OFF ALREADY !
Thanks again for having us over. It was A LOT of fun.
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