Incarceration on a daily basis

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take - but by the moments that take our breath away."

So many of you probably don't know this but I spend 5 days a week incarcerated. That drinking and driving and crack smoking has finally caught up with me. No.... not really I actually work in the local jail as a Substance Abuse Treatment Provider. I work in a unit of 64 men or 32 women on a daily basis. I work directly in their housing units, that's right most the time they pee and shower right there in front of me. I think I have the greatest job ever, my friends mostly think I am nuts. I have worked in this field for over 11 years left for about 1.5 years to try something new and couldn't stay away. A definite chain of events today has led me to write this blog. First, I work with a coworker who is intensely cynical and burned out, I had a new intern start today, and I received a call from 2 different people whom had been in my program over 4 years ago and recently one of my "inmates" died....... I couldn't help but think all day today just how lucky and grateful I am to have the gift of work that I do everyday. Not often do we get to "give it away" hope is what I am talking about..... Not often do we get blessed with the job of simply instilling hope in individuals who have lost it. Hope is an amazing thing I watch it fall into souls everyday and as quickly as they find it, it can be lost. Currently, I work with men who have committed crimes as simple as Driving on a suspended license to career criminals and everything in between. They don't all get out of the program and become successful individuals, and that is not what it is about for me.... What life is really about is potential, to see someone who has felt like they could never succeed, endure and entire paradigm shift and have the opportunity to be successful is amazing. To watch self esteem and hope walk up and tap "grown men" on the shoulder is a gift. I mostly wanted to put it out there today that I am so grateful!!

I 2 different phone calls today from two different women that I have worked with in the past 4 years. They both lived a life of severe drug addiction and crime and were able to gain the tools necessary to be successful.... There is nothing like that call the "Hi Becky, this is so and so and I just needed to tell you THANK YOU, I am a new mom, or I am a grandma" I will keep in touch!! That's worth it..... So my coworker is as mentioned earlier the most cynical person I have met I am sure it is based on burnout.. Sad I hate that!!! If I am ever at that point with my job "SOMEBODY MAKE ME STOP"

Well this has been a bit gushy, I don't know I had to say it.... Some aren't so lucky to love their job. I guess if I have to leave my kids everyday for 8 hours it is a good thing I have something that I feel this grateful for!!